Last days here, naked walls, empty cupboard and fridge, and a lot of space start to develop nostalgia even when we haven’t left. I miss it and we haven’t left.
This is always gonna be our first house, just Tia and me. Somehow it has a strong and gigantic emotional value. It has been a really good battle for our relationship to live during winter in such small summer city. We really have worked out our muscle of communication and resistant of patience.
I mean that because our studio is/was like 30 m2: bathroom and one room: kitchen, living room, bedroom. More than once one of us has felt suffocated by the smell of cooking food. Or saturated by the fact that you can’t leave the room after a discussion. But still, this didn’t make any wound that didn’t heal and all of the scar has made us stronger and compatible, and over all of this, the ministrawberry on the strawberry on the cake is that we have now high levels of understanding and tolerance.
There are people I would like dedicate this post and give special thanks for helping us:
Special thanks to Aino who has shared her furniture and kitchen tools so we could have human conditions to live in.
Jari and Eeva for all the support and advice and positive energy.
To my sister Carla who came here to see us and push me forward when I was feeling a bit defeated.
To Bea and Juhana came and helped Tia a lot with packing and moving most of the stuff to Helsinki.
The first chapter of Noric Faro
—> Second: Helsinki and Slovenia-Vienna Trip
Just after having spent almost the whole exchange together we both were conscious that distance could be a big test for our relationship. In fact, it was.
Tia went back home and her family prepared a big welcoming party because they are like sweet sugar cotton. Then she got a job in customer service for one of our “things”, selling ice cream. (During our time in Maribor, we ate huge amounts of ice cream from Ilich – one of the best cafeterias of Slovenia. We were so frequent customers, that we got some volume benefits on the ice cream portion.) Continuing with Tia’s arrival, so her family and friends were joyful with her coming back.
When I arrived in Tenerife my family and friends also were excited about me coming back. The difference was that I stayed there for a week and then I came back to Maribor, to do some extra exams. I spent a large number of hours in library, but also with Ryan and friends. Nevertheless, when I was at home the lack of Tia was so deep on the chest. You are able to actually feel gravity oppresing weight down to you. I tried to fulfill the emptiness with hard work in the library and having fun in the afternoon, but still. That last month there, thank god that Ryan was there, he helped me a lot.
Then 2016 academic year was ended.
September in Tenerife, It means sun, good weather, thousand of alternatives, but I was missing Tia like one who missed those summers when you were a kid. I felt like that was my permanent state of being. I wasn’t able to be in social enviroments, it was difficult to talk with people who I didn’t know and to be in meetings with more than 4 people. I was rushing the time so somehow I would be closer to reach Tia sooner. Each of all my decisions were focused on being together: I changed to distance university, so I could continue studying; I organized all my money so I knew how long I could be there independently; we found a place to live; I bought the flight tickets.
Here I am, sometimes I feel overwhelmed for culture and for not having income.
But I am happy, because all my wishes right now are just material or vain.
I am happy because I am every day with a woman who does every action with love and kindness. I am happy because even though the problems and the battles we stand up together and solve it and reinforce our connection.
I am happy because I am doing what I want the most with the person I love the most.
19th of December 2016 – 3rd day in Finland
Since I met Tia Maria Vahasarja I knew that one day we would be living together so here I am, in dark and cold but humble and prosperous Finland. Winter temperatures around minus 15 to 1ºC. She lives in the small city of Vaasa where Sun is very shy and goes up often at 10 and leaves more or less at 14, barely perceptable and without warmth to offer. At the moment we are in a shared flat where Tia has been living last couple of months while I was in Tenerife. We got to know each other in Slovenia in 2015 during Erasmus exchange programme. October 13th was our first date. She was dressed up in pink, I was in black. Eventually, we became serious, It was 8th December when we had the conversation. So it means that basically we have lived in the same place before, although there is a slight difference between now and then. Back then we somehow knew that one day we will separate and see what’s going to happen. Now it is very different, now we dont have “departure day”.
At Savica waterfall, Slovenia, April 2016
I was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina, one of the southest countries in the world. My chilhood and part of teenage life was there, I still remember when I got my first bus card. I was 8 years old and by the age of nine i had taken all the lines in Mar del Plata. Sometimes I was just on buses for two hours making the whole cycle. Just after my 16th birthday my sister came to pick me up so that all the sibilings would be living together, so I moved to Tenerife, Spain. Already going to the north.
16 years old in Tenerife
When I got into university I had heard about Erasmus exchange programme, so my aim was to be able to go somewhere. I will never forget when I was choosing destinations. My choices were: 1st Germany; 2nd Poland and 3rd – where can I go? This list isn’t long but I don’t know where… Italy? France? Slovenia… This sounds exotic – I didnt’t even know where it was located. The exchange was supposed to be from September to January, but just after a month there, and meeting Tia I was sure about prolonging my period. So luckily we both were able to do that. Pretty impulsive but the only compass was our hearts, and both shared same direction. Eventually we finished the exchange, she went home and so did I. Immediately after arriving I changed to distance university. But 4 months separeted was enough to pack my life in two bags (20 and 10 kg) and move willingly to Finland. It has been a long journey navigating from the south until this nordic land where the constellations and Nordic Faro have guided me. To find the salvation and love.
Vaasa, January 2017